A Waste of Time

So, like I was saying, I’m working on my next printed issue, and I really want this one to be big. I was racking my brain, trying to think of what I can do to just make this the biggest comic possible, and it hit me: Who can make any book huge? Who has that magic touch that can get millions of people reading something mediocre that they wouldn’t otherwise have an interest in? Oprah, of course! I need to get this next issue to be an Oprah book club book, and I’ll be set! Just as long as I don’t cross her and she doesn’t decide to James Frey me, that is. So, in the interest of maximizing the book club potential for the next issue, I’ve decided to include backmatter, consisting of an interview with me and a Readers’ Group Guide. This is page one of the interview that I’ve given. Fame and fortune are almost here, I can feel it. Taste it. Thank you in advance, Oprah.